ThirtyThree

  Sex is a physical capacity, but its exercise is determined by man’s mind—by his choice of values, held consciously or subconsciously. Sex is one of the most important aspects of man’s life and, therefore, must never be approached lightly or casually. A sexual relationship is proper only on the ground of the highest values one can find in a human being. Sex must not be anything other than a response to values. And that is why people consider promiscuity immoral. Not because sex is evil, but because sex is too good and too important. To a rational man, sex is an expression of self-esteem—a celebration of himself and of existence. To the man who lacks self-esteem, sex is an attempt to fake it, to acquire its momentary illusion. The man who despises himself tries to gain self-esteem from sexual adventures—which can’t be done, because sex is not the cause, but an effect and an expression of a man’s sense of his own value.  The men who think that wealth comes from mat...

  There are two aspects of man’s existence which are the special province and expression of his sense of life: love and art. Man is an end in himself. Romantic love—the profound, exalted, lifelong passion that unites his mind and body in the sexual act—is the living testimony to that principle. One gains a profoundly personal, selfish joy from the mere existence of the person one loves. It is one’s own personal, selfish happiness that one seeks, earns and derives from love. Romantic love, in the full sense of the term, is an emotion possible only to the man (or woman) of un-breached self-esteem: it is his response to his own highest values in the person of another—an integrated response of mind and body, of love and sexual desire. Such a man (or woman) is incapable of experiencing a sexual desire divorced from spiritual values. A “selfless,” “disinterested” love is a contradiction in terms: it means that one is indifferent to that which one values. Love, friendship, respect, admira...